A Writer's Writings

   When I was a little boy, I never wrote. I never wanted to write. I never really had much of an identity, at least not that I could identify. I was an echo, of sorts. Just another raindrop in a storm, a single snowflake in December. I don't remember when I started to write, though I think it was overdue. Now, you know, the more I write on this blog (and of course in my own little books), the more I realize just why I am writing it at all. There is a lot that gets put down to writing simply because it is a blockage that needs cleared. Those thoughts are just for me. Then, I started writing for other people. Or so I thought...it seems that when I write for others, I am also writing for myself, just in a different way.

Side point. Have you ever tried writing a letter to yourself? Try it. Be brutally honest. For example:

"Trevor, if this means you must travel, then go on a journey with only a bag on your back and a map in your heart. The road goes even on, and you must follow it if you can, even if you shouldn't expect where it may lead. In all things, stick to Jehovah, and the road will always be bright, even though it rains every so often."

   Moving on. Here are my thoughts. Some write to communicate. Letters, emails, etc. I've done it. You've done it. Others might try to keep journals to express their emotions or to get a clearer understanding of a situation. People all over the world write. Aha, but I ask: "What is a writer?"
   Would you agree with me if I said that the fact that people write doesn't make them writers anymore than pouring a bowl of cereal makes someone a chef? Something more is needed to be considered a 'writer'. This is where that alphabetical representation of lettering comes into play. By putting thoughts down to paper, they are given a physical form. Letters become vessels for thought.
  This being the case, to be a writer, isn't it more accurate to call oneself a thinker? Not in a cursory sort of understanding of the word, though, for just as not all who write are 'writers', then not all who think are 'thinkers'. It goes deeper than that. I believe that a true thinker, a true writer, is one who explores. One who uses a pen, or a pencil, or a brush, or whatever it may be to delve deeper; to see what is too far to be seen, to wander off the edge of the world. A writer is one who gathers material from life itself, and who seeks such wanderlust...seeks to become lost in all that is beautiful and terrible in the world.

   Maybe some write to be read, and others write to discover, and discover to write. It is for this that I write. No, never will anything that I record contain a Plato inspired epiphanitical (Custom word again) statement, and I am sure that my letters will never inspire or motivate as the classical writers of ole. I didn't start to write to be read. I kept them locked away, like it was a diary or something. The more I read of others, though, the more I wanted to write, and eventually share. Which brings us here. Therefore, as you continue to read this or not, you are getting a little peek into the innards of me. You have been warned.

   Writing with Jehovah in mind, with my spirituality held in my heart as well as my pen, has helped me see that we have to make the best out of any situation, to learn how to fight pain with a different set of eyes than before. We learn to face up to the facts like a spiritual man/woman. Learn to hurt like an adult, and to learn how to learn from that hurt. Ask me why, and I'd tell you that we're different as Jehovah's people. We're not the type to shrink back, to break without healing, or to give up. Even Hemming way said that a man was not made for defeat, and that he can be destroyed but not defeated. Scripture, writings from fellow brothers, and even my own writings helped me see that we're stronger than that. Jehovah has made us stronger than that. Sometimes its okay to lie down for today. But tomorrow, we have to get back up. Keep giving. Keep struggling to do good by Jehovah. Don't have any regrets, and don't look back at what has to stay in the past. Learn what we can from it, and march on. That is what this blog is about. Not just my blessings of need greating, or my Bethel service.
   This blog is about life, in all its totality.

Patterson, Bethel: Discover

     Every so often, an adult might just stumble upon themselves. Not in the clumsy sense, where they trip over their own steps, but more of a discovery type of stumble, like where you run into an old friend in the city and can't help but think 'What are the chances? Small world, huh?'. More expansively, the internal bumping into Self can occur, I believe. And, I believe, I've bumped into myself.
Sometimes we find this person whether we wanted to or not, or even meant to. Suddenly, no more is there the luxury of having our identity handed to us by those who wrote our character's role in the book we were penned into long before we knew we could choose for ourselves, write for ourselves, or even live for ourselves. Such a blessing of a malediction is a macabre sense of comfort as its arms hold tighter than we might be comfortable with. It grants a haunt of a welcome, really. Faced with this character, it's time to accept him. And build on him.

So here is a short post. Even though it's been months since my last one! 
How about an update on my Bethel life?
     I have had three main assignments since here in Bethel. First, I started as a Waiter. Then, I was transferred to the Kitchen. Now, I am in Kitchen Receiving. This means that I am pretty much the stocker for the Kitchen. Not stalker. Very different. I handle all the deliveries for the Kitchen, put it all away, organize it all, FIFO ('First in, First out' food regulations), and check quality of it all. I also handle the KDR (Kitchen/Dinning Room Dock) upstairs, where we get all of our things. If something needs sent to another complex, or we get something from them, I handle it. Mostly. This assignment has some paperwork, as well, so I have an office to assist me in taking care of that. Which is odd that I should have an office. Just saying.

     Anyway. Now It's been 6 months since I came to Bethel the second time. I have choices to make. Very large choices. It's funny how things continue to change, no matter how much they've changed already. Just when you think life couldn't be reshaped again, there it goes morphing around like a lava lamp. It's quite beautiful, really...like a psychedelic floating waterdrop with loads of different food coloring in it. Or you know, like a lava lamp.

So anyway. I've been thinking of including video blogs. So keep that in mind, huh? Might be fun. 

As always, thanks for reading.
~T

Bethel: 1/4 of a Year

To My Readers, New and Old:
 (Mentioning the reason I blog)
    Well great. You did it now, didn't you? You're indelibly marked with the memory of me. You see, by picking this up and even passively scanning it over, you have just taken the first step of a sort of 'thousand mental mile' journey through the usually unobservable spooky attic of the mind of the writer. That's where I store all the old dusty things, like patterned coats that belong mostly to the moths. Yup. Even if you put this down now and never came back to it, I have already begun my memoritical (I may have invented that word) growth in your head. Some day in the future you might just recall that little portion you read in that one blog that one time and want to come back for more, a reminder of just how unforgotten I remain. Now that we find ourselves here, dear reader, we might as well make the best of it.

    Seriously, though. What an oddity that I should feign such creativity and fortitude so as to begin to write anything more substantial than a sticky note reminder to myself. I can guarantee you that I never had any sort of thought that contained enough depth to entertain even the most primordial of persons, thus I never ventured far from the inclosing fences of an unchallenged brain. But my brain ached with inactivity, though I didn't at the time realize it. Therefore, a consistent theme in my life was the nagging feeling like I should be doing something more creative with my brain juices, that I needed to forcibly take that first metaphorical-step in what would be an epic journey through what I previously insisted and convinced myself was charted territory, mapped and annotated. But little did I realize how fantastically limitless the recesses of the mind truly are, how untapped the possibilities remain, and how untouched such regions of thought still are left over, a tempting sea of considerations and musings that stretch farther than sunrise to sunset itself and leave far behind the understandings of even the most farsighted of men and women. Then was the moment that I discovered the curtain that divided the secluded closet of my mind that floats aimless in the ne'er sailed expanses just beyond. Upon seeing through the thin slit opening of this closed veil, curiosity burned in my heart, devouring the usual overwhelming sense of contentment. So as eventuality would have it, here I am putting letters onto pages, letters that are arranged in a specific pattern forming words to express the thoughts I wish to record in paragraphical (also a made up word) format.
   With all of this said and read, the question begs to be asked and answered: "What, then, prompted me to write?"
   Lurking behind this question is a shadowy enigma of a premise of why writing even exists in the first place. What motivates anyone to write? Why make use of a method of alphabetical representation such as writing to express the musings of the human mind? Why write but to be read, right?
Not necessarily.

But alas, this is not the blog for such things. I might write about that on 'Storytime', but let me get to answering the request I got from a reader.
After three months of Bethel service (round two), I dare say its time to unlock the cyberspace slot of my blog again. Would you like to hear what a Bethelites schedule is? Yeah? Well I'll tell you what a waiter's schedule consists of, how about that?

-5:45am Depending on how late I got to bed, I like to get up early. This allows me to shower and what not with a measure of comfort, rather than rushing. That also helps avoid a congested bathroom in the morning, as we have 5 guys in this room. From there, I usually do some light reading before I begin work.
-6:55am Work starts for waiters. As a waiter, I have to be all dressed up, checked in, and ready to rock before this. Then for my current assignment, I start seating the Bethel family at :55.
-7:00am Morning Worship starts. Since I work during it, I get what we call 'Late Breakfast' at 8:45am or so, where the cooks and waiters have their meal and watch the Morning Worship program.
-12:35pm I have my lunch break. As a waiter, we have less time. I start work again at 1:15pm on my current assignment, but we also get off at 4:20pm instead of 5pm as the most of the Family does.
-4:20pm I am off! Dinner for the Family starts at 5pm, but older ones can eat at 4pm, and the waiter crew can eat at 4:20pm.

Mondays: 6:15pm is Monday Night Watchtower Study! After that, I have Bethel Entrance School at 7:30pm. An hour later, I head home.
Thursdays: I have my meeting, which is about an hour away. That means I leave Bethel at 5:50pm or so. I usually get back around 10pm or so.
Saturday: Service! Sometimes we stay over the weekend at someone's house, and hit up Sunday Meeting.
Sunday: Meeting!
Rinse, repeat.


Now for an abrupt end, thanks for reading!

~T

Bethel: A Year In Patterson, Bethel

Imagine the scene:

     A cloistered complex, filled with young and old ones leaving behind the halcyon of the old days. Putting hand to the plow for a common purpose, that of serving their God, Jehovah.
Yup. That's Bethel. And yup. That's where I am, at the current time.

     So pretty much, I've been in Bethel for over a month now. Why haven't I updated my blog? Well to be honest, I wasn't in a writing mood. And I hate to force out a post, but rather, I like to allow my mind to tackle a post more when I am prepared for it. So my apologies, but I assure you this is the best course of action. So here we are, posting. What to include?
Now in an effort to avoid boring you with the minutiae of everyday Bethel life, I'll focus on the more salient points of my time here in Patterson. Rooming, Work, Congregation, etc. 

Rooming

Well I am in a five man room. (Shriek!) No no no. It isn't that bad. Let me finish! It is actually like...3 rooms connected. Its like a huge room with walls. And two bathrooms. Remember Italy? Yeah. I have my own bed this time. Rock that. So compared to Italy this is palatial, thus no complaints to me. And my roommates are kind of awesome, to boot. No complaints.

Work

Many of you know my deepest passion. Food. No, this doesn't mean I know how to prepare it, serve it, or do anything else with it. I know how to eat it. And I can eat it well. Now how, you might ask, does this matter? As Jehovah's will would have it, I am in Food Services. More specifically, I am a waiter. Well...sort of. I am being duel trained right now, as they haven't the manpower to fulltime train me for waiter. So I wait the breakfast meal, then cook all day. Then rinse, repeat. August 5th, I will be trained for fulltime waiting.
They are putting me to work, and making me break a sweat everyday. My moto? Don't try to show them up, just try to keep up. So far, the work load is fine. I have had far worse jobs. So while I am moving all day, nonstop, this isn't the first time I've ever worked. So pretty much, I'm already used to that.

What else is awesome? The Gilead Students are in right now. After class, they are sent to work assignments, which means I am regularly working with them. That is sort of fantastic. Just saying. 

Congregation

I have been assigned to Trumbull, Connecticut English. They have about 100 publishers, and so many young ones that its nearly ridiculous. And they are the kids that outshine the Bethelites in commenting and service! Like I said, don't try to show them up, just try to keep up.

Additional Thoughts

Yup. Now. I asked of Jehovah for a second shot at Bethel. He blessed my request, and offered me a year of service in Patterson. I accepted. So until the clock strikes 1 year, I'll give Jehovah my 100% here in New York. In the meantime, staying busy helps offset the dreaded Homesickness.

Yes, I'll be totally honest, I have been very, very homesick.
UGH. TREVOR, WE TALKED ABOUT THIS.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well you know what? I love Alaska, and I love my Family and Friends. I am hardly worth a second look without them. It is certainly the only downside I cant think of to being in Bethel.
The work? Nah. 
The roommates? Nope. 
The schedule? Not even. 
Its all about my cursed heart. It longs so strongly for the people I care about, that it begins to be my end. Its strange, because I have such a deep appreciation for what Jehovah has given me, and I love the fact that I can be back in Bethel! But in the middle of all the joy is the pain of heart. The first week was the worst. Since then, its still ever present each day, but more or less it is more manageable each day (though some days it completely surges up strong). Literally a weight on my heart, where I can actually feel it PHYSICALLY . To be honest, I don't see me being able to ever root it out completely, but I find that I am able to survive more and more by looking for ways to be busy, and by following closely in the pattern of Lamentations 3:55-57. Rely on Jehovah, that is the key to happiness and contentment. So while it pulls me down each day, I can stand again, knowing that the ones I love and miss are the same ones that are happy for my efforts, and are praying for me, as I pray for them.Yes, that helps me greatly in my convincing my heart to quell its sobbings, even if it is simply a temporary palliation.

So to my dear Family and Friends that I so miss, thank you. I miss you, I love you, and I know that if not on this side of The Battle, then I will spoil myself with an eternity of your company. 

And to my dear readers, fear not. I have been through far worse than homesickness, and my Father has pulled me up and out of the deepest of pits. I write these seemingly less positive thoughts simply to include a measure of realism. Life isn't all about rainbows and butterflies, right? When we are shattered on the rocks, its how we respond from that point that defines who we are. Do we allow our broken bodies to lay there lifelessly, or do we reach for Jehovah's hand?
Jehovah. Thank you for reaching your hand out before I even reached out my own.

Ciao for now, readers! Questions or comments, you know what to do and how to do it. :]

Alaska: Life's Chapters

   Ugh. It's 5:30am right now. I know many people do it, but I don't think a human should ever be up at this hour. It simply isn't natural. (Watch that get me some hate mail) So why am I up at 5:30am? Simply put, I can't sleep. A New Chapter has begun, my dear readers. Never a vapid day in the life of Trevor. Yes. Vapid. That is my new word. Look it up. Though, I have been using it a lot as of late. Maybe too much, really. I think I am starting to kill it. Poor guy.

Allow me to give a touch of introduction.

   As many of my friends will know, I have had a bit of a difficult time as of late. "Daw, what's wrong, Trevy boy?" A lot, you condescending stinks. But really, while that doesn't sound so encouraging to admit that I've had my metaphorical butt kicked recently, I have found a measure of comfort in others being honest about their difficulties. Now, I don't dare insinuate that we should, as a brotherhood or as friends, go dumping our problems indiscriminately on each other, but a measure of honesty and truthfulness about it is refreshing! It's true, I lie to you not.  Jehovah gave us a provision of brothers and sisters, so why would we want to purposefully ignore it when we need it so badly? So anyway, the old saying 'when it rains, it pours' has proven quite true in my case. I have gotten soaked since returning from Italy. Eesh. In the heat of it all, though, many wonderful things have happened that I'll never regret. It has been a rewarding adventure in itself. I even had Wonder Woman involved, how great is that? (I bet that confused a lot of readers, meh heh heh)

   Okay, I digress. Yes, its another word I haven't used much before.

   The purpose of this post is quite clear, really. At least to my muddled mind. I will be as succinct as I can in telling you about this new Chapter. I was thinking of a number of different ways that I might be able to tell you all this news that I have, and I had some tantalizing options available to me. "Do I lead them on with a story? Maybe a touch of humor! Or perhaps I could share an example about how wonderful Jehovah is, and how he blesses our efforts?" I decided to do it this way.

   At a low point in my year, I was re-reading a 3 page letter that a friend gave to me (believe it or not, I've never actually met her in person, but I still count her as a friend...long story), but this time noticed the back side of the last page had something more written on it. I have no idea how I missed it before...anyway. It started off by saying:
"Never doubt what Jehovah can do, and that he can do it quickly." (If you're reading this, thank you, LM. You have no idea how much you helped me!) Now that gave me some comfort. I was reminded that the trials that seemed to be piling one on top of the other were only temporary, and that Jehovah can easily provide the strength you need to endure. Who doesn't benefit from reminders?
   So there I was yesterday, feeling rather squishy. I was up on the roof ripping of shingles after service, and was trying not to get overwhelmed and sob like a wet noodle trying to remain upright. Really banking on the C.O. visit (which starts today) to super charge me again. While I'm up there, my sister comes home from the mail box, rather somber.

Ah yes. This is where I reveal what news I got. This is the moment that I can tell all my readers what has transpired, and how Jehovah has again proven to be thoroughly involved in my life. THIS is where LM was so correct in her letter to me about how quickly Jehovah can act! You see, my friends, that day, swollen eyes and quivering, sobby faced though I was, I got a letter in the mail. With a mix of excitement and worry in her voice, my sister looked at me and said:

"Trevor...you have mail. From Watchtower."

Ready? I can wait if you want. Okay, I will wait. Take 5.
...Better? Okay, here we go.

I have been accepted to Patterson Bethel, NY for one year. 

I'll leave it here for now. I have one month to prepare, as I leave June 27th. Expect a few posts before then. Until then, please continue to pray to Jehovah at all times, good or bad. May all Glory and Honor be given to Him.

Thanks for reading. :]
~T

Alaska: Of Past, Present, and Future

Remember when I wrote that post in Uganda on my birthday? I had just turned 23, and was in the heart of Africa, surrounded by both friends and enemies. Well, I'm 25 now. I know, right? It has already been 2 years since Uganda.

Game changer.
"What?"
Well, some of you might remember me saying that there was a game changer coming up. I think it's time to tell you. It's taken me some time to decide on it, but with that time and plenty of prayer, it seems like the proper choice to make.

I've signed up for Bethel service again.

Now slow down, don't get your pages wrinkled. I know this is not the type of thing to broadcast to the world, and that most brothers or sisters will keep it to themselves instead of mentioning that they applied to something. In fact, that is what I did last time.
This time, however, I wanted it to be different. Let me give some explanations.

Why share this with readers so early on?

I want to share it with my readers this time. I can foresee a number of benefits from this. Maybe there are some readers out there that are also waiting for something to happen, either an application to be accepted, a goal to be reached, a trial to be over, or whatever. Any number of things, really. I can completely understand the feelings behind so many reasons to wait. So writing down this reason to wait can build a bridge between myself and some of my readers, and give some common ground for us to stand on. Maybe by being with me as I wait through this will help some of you, as I am sure that it will help me.
What if I am not accepted? All the more so, then, to share. Overcoming disappointed hopes, recognizing that perhaps what we had in mind wasn't what Jehovah had in mind, being willing to make adjustments, being willing to be as Jeremiah was and be molded in the hands of the Potter, Jehovah...All of this will be included in the experience if I am NOT accepted to Bethel, just as it would be included in many other times of life where waiting is required.

Why sign up for Bethel again?

It's time. I have seen many different parts of the world so far, all in Jehovah's service. But the time is coming for me to stop bouncing around every 6 months, and to establish myself more long term. Find a place for my roots to really grow. Does this mean that I am giving up on need greating? Not in the slightest way. My long term goal is a life of constant need greating where ever Jehovah will allow me. It is simply time to move out and on. Thus, I am faced with the choice.
Where?
In that choice, there is a strong underlay of aspects to be considered. Why move on? With what expectations? What goals? What resolve have I built with which to sustain myself?
At this point in my life, I feel the need to establish my heart stronger with Jehovah so that I do not slip into 'everyday life' syndrome. This means not having the best job, not having a pimped out Jeep (that I would so desperately love), not buying the latest from Sony, Nintendo, or Microsoft, not seeking out a small cabin in the mountains of Alaska, etc etc. Instead, this means setting my heart and eyes on something of a much higher value. One of the best ways to do that at this moment would be to completely immerse myself in Jehovah's service. Bethel. If not accepted, then I will apply again, find a place to serve in need greating more long term, and continue to wait. Either way, my need greating isn't over, and neither is my blogging. (Oh yeah, I guess that also means you can read about my experiences if I DO get accepted, too!)

Why did you ever leave Bethel to begin with, if only to attempt to go back?

Honestly, immaturity and fear. Yes, there were a lot of things at home that I wanted to try and assist with, but it falls down ultimately to a naive sense of my own worth. Coming from a large family that has many special needs children, there are many different responsibilities that need taken care of. Considering that I was raised in such a situation, it is my realm, it is my normal. It is my typical. Bethel was so different from that, and I daily listened to the problems mount and build back home. After a year, I went home with the thought that I could solve the problems, with an ever present fear of being out of my own comfort zone for much longer.
Silly boy.
While I don't regret being of service to my family, and my loyalty has not waned with even the variation of a shadow, things are different the second time around. Elements that prevented a great many experiences are recently removed. With the removal, a sea of possibility was set before me. It is a daunting feeling, knowing that what controlled every aspect of my life for 25 years is suddenly removed. A frightening sense of freedom, of a lack of what chains I would call normal, of nothing to tether me. It is a terrifying experience, suddenly faced with nothing but myself as company.
While I am still home for the time being, the door has been opened, and I never even knew there was a possibility to go through it, as I expected this element to haunt me till Armageddon. Now it is gone, and this open door of opportunity invites me. I must choose to go or to stay.

I choose to go.

Thus, ends this post. Questions are invited. Comments are most welcome. Both are encouraged.

Ps. Let's have a little feed back from the readers, alright? I know a number of you had guesses on what the game changer was, right? Well leave a comment and tell us what you thought it was! If you were right, you can have some digital cookies!

~Trevor


Pss. This is my 100th post!

Alaska: Writing Tips

Before I write an official post, I would like to address some requests that a few of my readers have made.
A number of my readers have expressed that they like my style of writing, and have asked that I give them pointers on how to improve their own. In light of this, buckle up.

10 points on:

How to Write Well Good

1. Avoid alliteration always.

2. Prepositions are not words to end sentences with.

3. The Passive voice is to be avoided.

4. Avoid cliches like the plague. They are old hat.

5. It is wrong to ever split an infinitive.

6. Writers should never generalize.

Seven: Be consistent

8. Don't use more words than necessary. It is most highly and certainly superfluous. 

9. Be more or less specific.

10. Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement.

With that, I hope that you are able to apply what you can to aid you in your writing endeavors. Until Next Time,

Trevor

Alaska- A Distant Village

BRR. That is all. BRR.

Health: Whooping cough and flu.

Jeep: Broken down.

Weather: -14F

Washing Machine: Dead.

Pioneer Hours: Behind. 

Current number of people in my household: 11.

Numerous other issues not fit for the blog: And counting.

Regrets: 0.

     Wow. I'll tell you what. I've had one hectic few weeks. You know the ol' saying: "When it rains, it pours?"
Well you didn't have to prove it! One thing after another, everything went downhill and decided to break on us, all at once! That seems to be the pattern that has ever been set. Still, I have 0 regrets. Why's that?

     Just like the most recent Watchtower study said, there is no use in focusing on the negative. While you can't ignore it, don't dwell. Fix what you can, endure what you cannot, and look ahead!

Christian Courage is not self reliance! So with that said, let's focus on something more positive!

-Drum roll please-

Witnessing to a Rural Russian Village outside of Homer, Alaska! 

*confetti*  *cheer*  *flash*

          Yes,  Jehovah has once again helped me to readjust my thinking. Many times, to serve where the need is greater can simply mean being available for Jehovah to use you , no matter where you are. Take, for instance, the brothers we recently talked about at the meeting in the 2012 yearbook. In Norway, the brothers were looking for ways to open up even more of their territory, and thus bought a boat to reach more people that they hadn't reached yet. A couple with children responded to the call they heard at the DC, and were thus blessed for it. Young brothers banded together and made what sacrifices they needed to in order to serve in a higher way. They all echo what one of the Society's videos about young people said: "Jehovah doesn't use the best, he uses who is available."

   Making myself available and being a little creative, I can serve where the need is greater right here in my home Horizon while I prepare for my Next Skyline. A few sisters in Homer helped solidify my realization when they invited me to go in field with them.Little did I know, but I was in for a real treat. You see, I was in Homer for work for a few weeks, so on the weekend I agreed to go with them in the ministry. Then, one of the sisters called and said that she wanted me to drive because we needed my 4x4 Jeep. 

Uh...what for? 

"For the Russian Village, of course!"

Oh, right! The Russian Village, what else? 

...Wait, the Russian Village?

     At the end of the road out of Homer, there is a gravel road. At the end of the gravel road, there is a dirt road. At the end of the dirt road, there is a trail down the edge of the cliff. At the end of the trail, there is a beach. A little ways down the beach is another trail, that turns into a small road. That road leads into the very rural, and very small Russian Village, where 30 to 40 houses rest. This was our territory for the DC invitation work. Well paint me surprised (and relived we survived the insane trail down the cliff), and call me Sally. (don't really, that would be silly. Sally? Come on) What else to do but get started?

     First person we talked to responded very kindly, but gave us a fair warning that many would not give us ear, as they are very, very devout Russian Orthodox. Fair enough, we thought, but we must try if they would allow us. And allow they did. Though we met one or two who were very guarded and told us: "You're in the wrong village!", we admired their devotion and pressed forward. Walking the village, we got to see everything from quaint cabins, small village life, to towering mountains, the beautiful inlet, and many other wonders of Jehovah's doing.

We covered the whole village that day, sharing Russian literature and the invitation to the DC held in Anchorage. Some of the villagers spoke wonderful English, which made it easy to speak with them, but some of them really didn't speak much English at all. Pretty much all they said was 'Hello!' and nodded with a warm smile, but being upright and breathing made them a target for us! (Completely appropriate laughing fit) After a while we began to get tired, so we plopped off the small village road and rested in the tall grass and warmth of a Summer Sun in Alaska. As we did, the others in our little group returned from a house to join us. They were just given a gift of vegetables from one of the villagers, so we all shared the freshly grown nom noms as I nearly fell asleep in the grass. What a dreamy feeling I got laying there, thinking about everything we had found that day, though a tad tired from preaching and walking. I was more appreciative for the further blessings Jehovah had given me, and the opening of my mind to the possibilities so near to my own home. I never thought I'd see such a wonderful experience so close!

     After we finished the last house, we headed back to my Jeep, waving goodbye once again to the man that we first talked to, (who's business brought him across our path a number of times that day). We drove away so very content, and made a few calls on the way back to Homer. After a wonderful experience, finally I dropped everyone off at the Kingdom Hall, and made my way back to the small cabin I was staying at for work, only about 1 1/2 hours from Kenai, home. 

     With that experience, I've decided that while I prepare for my Next Skyline of serving where the Need is Great, I'll make the most of the Horizon of home. I'm planning to start setting aside whole days to take on the different Villages throughout our large territory here in Alaska. Who knows what I might find, serving where Jehovah sends me?

I've said it before, and I'll say it again. Thank you, Jehovah. 

Ps. And a special thanks to the sisters who invited me to join them that day! They helped me see the Need and contentment to be found in my Home Horizons.

Pss. Thanks again, readers, for encouraging me to keep up writing.

Psss. I could write a whole new post just on pssssss's. 

Pssss. Questions, comments, suggestions, recipes, etc, etc, drop me an email or comment. You should know that by now, though. Yeah?

skylinepath@yahoo.com

~T

Alaska - A Link to the Past

*Raises eyebrow*
What is that on my browser? A link to a site. Odd, I don't remember seeing this before.
*Clicks link*
WHOA! What IS this? I swear, this looks almost...familiar! Haven't I seen this site before? Wait, it's talking about me? It's even got stories about me?! WHO WROTE THIS?!

Oh, that's right. I have a blog.

"Welcome Back!" You might say to me. "Long time no write!" I might say back. I wouldn't, though, because it really hasn't been that long since I've written. Oh, on the blog? Well yes, I've not written on my blog for a while. This is how it seems to go, doesn't it?

Well nothing too noteworthy to write about, really, other than the differences of serving back in my home congregation. (So I guess that means that there really IS a lot to write about) I will post about that, though, as I think that the reflection shown to us in the mirror of time's passage can be quite the read, really. You might actually really like to read some of those thoughts. That will have to come at another time, but it is certainly coming. (Haven't I said that a lot?) ((Oh, and also I wanted to write about some of the privileges I've enjoyed since coming home, like witnessing to an entire SUPER RURAL Russian Village))

Remember when I said that there was a game changer coming? And remember when a good number of my readers thought I meant I was dating? HA! Don't make me laugh. No, really, don't. I have a cough lately, and my chest is sore. Laughing hurts. I will find a significant other at some point, but I'm not at that point in my life yet. This game changer is something else entirely. I'll give you a hint, but not now.

In a few months, start to keep your eyes open for a new link on my blog, leading you to a hint. Sure, I could just tell you, but where's the fun in that?
:]

Alaska- In Between

This is a very NON-visionarily minded post, mainly due to the fact that I'm just too lazy to pull out my camera and shoot away again.
Have you ever wanted to know what it means to be a 'Need Greater' when you're 'in between'? By 'in between', I mean in between ventures, of course. Well, I can tell you JUST what it is like.
Work.
Work.
And more Work.

Very near the time I returned to Alaska, there I was, stressing over money and funds and bills and my broken car. "Oh, Jehovah, HOW am I going to make this work? I'm so poor, and my car is broken, and bills are due, and bla bla bla, and whine, whine, whine." Stupid little boy that I am, haha. Why might I say that? All of a sudden a noise rang deep in my stomach, chill as the coldest of nights. A noise, though, that would prove to be my saving wings.
A text.
Now, when I'm REALLY stressed out, the last thing I want to do is talk to someone, and at this point in my life, I was very tired and oh, OH so very hungry. Those, combined with the stresses of my funds, made for a rather unpleasant day. So eventually I finished reeling over the pain and inconvenience of a text and began checking who dared to text me at such an inopportune time. It was a sister that I just KIND of knew. I don't dare use her real name, so let's call her Batgirl.
So Batgirl texted me. Long story short, this my version of what she said.
"Hello! This is Batgirl! Do you want a job working for my father?"
I called her. It was a job working with a Fire and Flood restoration company in Homer, Alaska ran by brothers. A lot of it was working on a demolition crew. The pay was better than my current job as a caregiver. The Fire Flood company doesn't work late or on weekends, so I could be at meetings and work my normal job on Saturday and Sunday (Remember, at this point I have all my Pioneer hours until September, so the last few months are dedicated to work). All I had to do was be prepared to work, work, work, and then work. Then, when I was done working, go back home to work, work, work, and work. The only downside was that Homer is about a 2 hour drive from my current home. Where would I live? Wait...my parents had just bought a cabin about 20 mins away. Perfect!
Long story short, I went from a desperate situation with little hope, to a chance to work my wee bum off in order to survive and thrive! All with one text. Thank you, Batgirl. I never knew you had a 'save Trevor's butt' tool on your utility belt.

Most honestly, however, thank you, Jehovah. I still don't know what my problem is, and why I cannot just get the hint that you're going to take care of me but what a weight it was to feel you lift that monster off my shoulders!

Now my life consists of working as a care giver on the weekends in Kenai, Alaska and working as a demolition crew guy on weekdays in Homer, Alaska. Then, I have Kenai congregation meetings with my privileges I have assigned to me there, and going to Homer meetings as well, filling in on a part here and there when needed. Add into that all the responsibilities of a large family with many adopted and special needs children, and every now and then doing something for myself. Jehovah keeps Trevor a busy boy.

This, my friends, is part of what it is like for a 'Need Greater' to be 'in between'. Yes, saving for a new Skyline (hopefully a more long term one) is hard work, but we know that we are afforded the 'Power beyond what is normal' to help us accomplish Jehovah's will here on this earth. Thanks indeed for reading along, and for sharing this little piece of my Skyline with me. More posts to follow, fear not! Maybe even a few pictures, haha!

~Trevor (Aniki)

Alaska- An Unexpected Journey

Well, at the be-hest of both my readers and my friends, maybe this journey has yet to have found its end. (Bossy readers, man. Killing my groove.)
I suppose it is time not to lay down the digital pen, but to press on and learn to see my Skyline with new eyes. As one reader said, just because I find myself in Alaska again doesn't mean my writing must end. So dear readers, I have changed my wishy-washy mind, and I have decided to continue writing! *confetti, fireworks, and poppers go off* I cannot update quite yet, but I will get to it, I promise you that!

Here are some of the things I can write about that you might see in upcoming posts.

• My day of preaching to an entire Russian village (about 38-40 houses in the middle of NOWHERE)
• My experiences in Homer, Alaska (Along with my new job)
• My new experiences in my old Congregation (Including a wonderful interview)
• The promised post about my roommates, haha!

I'll get around to it eventually. I have such a busy schedule because I am such a popular guy, so I will see if I can pencil you in somewhere. *scribble scribble*

A Sweet Farewell

Dear Readers,

It is a bitter-sweet post, this one. Sad to say, there is at least some truth to the saying: "All good things come to an end." And yes, as things will always come and go, there are always new beginnings and eventual endings.

It seems that we have come to an end, Readers.
Yes, this is the last post that I will leave on this blog.

Simply put, the time has come to put this blog to rest. Of course, my story and adventures will certainly continue as I keep to my Skyline Path in seeking to continue serving where there is a greater need for Kingdom Publishers, but for now I will not be making any additions to my blog. Perhaps at another time, but that is yet to be seen.
As grateful as I am for having been able to share my adventures with everyone, this Chapter of Writing has come to its end. What started as a way to keep family updated on my situation became a wonderful time of being able to share experiences, tell stories, and enjoy a wonderful interchange of encouragement with friends around the globe. I never knew that so many would be reading along with me as I told my humble little story, but how grateful I am to everyone who has indeed followed along.
Thank you, Readers. I really do appreciate every last one of you. And of course, thanks be to Jehovah for all He has done in my oh so short life, and all that He will continue to do for all of His servants.

If, though, this is your first time visiting my site, feel free to browse around. My Blog followed me as I was given the privilege of serving in the ministry in a high need area through my short time in Fort Portal, Uganda, the transition in Alaska again after Africa, and then through my equally short time in Bologna, Italy.

Feel free to continue to comment or ask questions if you have any. Also, don't be afraid to email me at skylinepath@yahoo.com, as I love to hear from my readers.


And Readers? Thank you.

~Trevor (Aniki)

Frankfurt, Germany- Waiting

SO SORRY!
Readers, dear, dear readers. Please forgive my lack of...well, everything. I am currently in Frankfurt, Germany, awaiting my next plane back home to Alaska. I have a 13 hour layover, haha...

I'll post next and catch everyone up on what is going on in my life.
In short, the Blessings of Jehovah are what make Rich. How true that has proved to be...

Posting soon, guys! Sorry!

~T

Italy- As the Time Flies

As of today, I have about 10 days left before I return to Alaska.

Things I have left to do in Italy:

• Go to my District Convention
• Hand over my studies
• Preform Publicly on the Ocarina (I mean, why not? Try and earn some lunch money)
• Wean myself from the Cappuccinos here
• Pack (Ooooh boy)
• Not cry during my last meeting this coming Sunday (Floodgates, people...)
• Say farewell to my friends here
• Prepare for next Feb.

Feb?
OH! That's right, I forgot to mention. (Not really, that was a ploy to get you hooked with curiosity)
I am returning to Italy for two months next Feb! No, no, no, the plan for Japan is still on, but I need to get at least another 2 months of Italy in while I have the opportunity! I still haven't seen Rome!
But seriously, I am not coming back for the touristy part of 'life' in Italy. The congregation here is amazing, and I can't pass up an opportunity to take part in the ministry here again. There comes that moment where a new congregation starts to feel just a sliver more like home, where you walk in and no longer feel like a guest. That happened here, and it kinda hurts to leave. Oh well, my Italy Chapter has a concluding paragraph coming up, and I better make it an amazing one at that.

As of now, Zech and I are going to Croatia again. He needs the stamp once more, and I am going to go with him for kicks. I mean, who doesn't love a little adventure? A lot of people, but I love it!

Thanks for sticking around, all, and take care! I'll update you soon about my roomies that have left, and some other happenings in the field and such here, okay?

BEEF. Its what's for dinner. (Because I can)
Where's the Beef?? (Because its before my time, but I'm not an ignorant fool of such 'forgotten times')
I'll miss you! (Because its my blog and I can cry if I wanna)

Ciao for now!
~T

Italy- Experiences from Bologna

With only a few hours left on the vote section, I decided to post about some of my service experiences in Bologna! I know, I should have waited for the time to be done. But as I've said before this is MY blog, so deal with it!
Studies can be hard to track down sometimes. They are elusive...
DISCLAIMER: I am going to be avoiding the use of names, so bear with me. Trust me, it helps. :]

When I finally met with one of my studies again (he keeps disappearing, sort of like an African Ninja), he seemed very disturbed. He was hesitant to say much of anything at first. Normally we consider some information from the BT book, and then we cover any questions that he may have, but this time I could tell that something was on his mind. So we decided to cover his questions first.
Normally, his questions are very scriptural. For instance:

• "If I marry outside of the faith, is it considered fornication in God's eyes?"

• "How can I live to please God?"

• "How can my relationship with God help me be happy even though I live through difficult times?"

This time, however, it was a bit different. And it caught me off guard.
"When you leave for America, who is going to continue my study?"
I have to admit, that got me a little emotional. Why?

The studies that we develop here with the friends from Africa are not simply 'Studies' with 'Africans'. They are developing friendships, all with the tears and smiles that are included in a 'typical' friendship. We learn of their history, of what causes their deepest pains, and we show how the scriptures can bring them from the 'Valley of Deep Shadow'. Though they may not know it, they encourage us just as much as we encourage them. They are assisted from friendship and the scriptures, and we are assisted from watching the truth open up before their eyes, the pain in their faces ease, and the regrets of the past become experiences that act as a catalyst for growth.
Because of this, hearing my study as he expresses a worry that this will end when I leave hit a soft part of Trevor. Part of this questions was I think in part because I was unable to find him for some time, and when I finally did find him again, he said that he has been suffering since our studies stopped. In what was only about a week period, you could see on his face how he dropped from not having a study about the bible.
This was where I told him the importance of of developing his own relationship with Jehovah. Then, when his study conductor is gone, he doesn't suffer spiritually.

"I have no friends here in the (refugee) camp because they do not share my belief in God," He said, " So when the day is done, I return to my room, read my bible, and sleep." When asked where he can find ones that encourage his spirituality, he wasn't sure. After that, I shared with him Hebrews so he could see for himself the importance of having that 'Interchange of Encouragement.'
"Where did they get their encouragement?" I asked.
"From the ministry." He said.
I replied: "Not quite. Who was he speaking with? Not with unbelievers, but with the brothers in the faith. He was telling this to those that already shared their beliefs. So where could these ones with the same faith meet together for spiritual encouragement?"
After thinking for a moment, he said: "The congregation." 
I think at that point, he started to understand.

Moving on.
Accompanying a brother on HIS study, he brought out a point I liked. Speaking about our daily bible reading, he said:
"Imagine a man decided to give you $1,440 everyday for no service. All he asks is that you set $10 aside in a bank account. Would you accept this offer?"
"Of course, I would accept." The student answered.
"This is similar to what Jehovah has given us. Each day, he has given us 1,440 minutes each day. Is it too much to ask that we give him 10 back for our bible reading?"
I liked it. I'm stealing it, and using it in a talk one day.

Finally, I wanted to share an illustration from the brother that gave the talk today. I liked it quite a bit.
The talk outline was: Why We as Christians are Different.

"One day a farmer finds in his field a small wolf puppy, abandoned. He knows that wolves pose a problem to his sheep, but he wants to give this puppy a chance. So he raises it himself. The puppy grows up with food, warmth, a home, and they love each other very much. One day, though, as he is now more grown, he is at the edge of the farm near the fence when he sees a pack of wild wolves. When they see him, they say: 
"What are you doing in there? Jump the fence and come with us! You can do whatever you want, and you can live free!"
"Hm..." The wolf puppy thinks to himself, "To live free? That sounds like fun!"
So the puppy leaves the farm, and for a long time he was free, doing what ever he wanted. Then came winter, though, and the wolves were all cold. They had no food, and no home. The wolf leader, a very evil wolf, said: "Lets go to the farm and take the sheep so we can eat!" 
The wolf puppy tried to stop them, but they refused to listen. So they all went to the farm, and started taking the sheep. However, the farmer heard the noise, and raced out with his gun. 
BANG BANG BANG BANG
He started to kill each one, until finally only the wolf puppy was left. Cowering in the corner, he begged: "Don't shoot! Its me, the wolf puppy! You raised me, and you love me! Remember?" 
The farmer looked at the wolf puppy for a moment, and raised his gun.
"You don't sound like the puppy I raised...you don't look like the puppy I raised, and you're not acting like the puppy I raised. I don't know you."
BANG.
What it boils down to is this: Will Jehovah recognize us when he comes to destroy the wicked? Will he be able to identify us as His by the way we sound, look, and act? Or will we look like a wolf?

Whew. Honestly, I desperately wanted the farmer to spare the puppy, but the puppy chose his fate.
So dear readers, what do you say? What are we going to be recognized as? A friend belonging to Jehovah, or a wolf belonging to the wicked?

WHEW. More to come, later, readers. I'll include the post about my current roommates. All of them (but Zech) are going to Israel this Wednesday! First up, Eric! Maybe. If I remember.

ps. I decided to label each post. That way it might be at least a little bit easier to navigate the archives so you know from what part of the world that particular post was written. :]

Italy- A Skyline Worth Following

 *stretch* Dear Readers. I suppose I should uphold my side and clarify. After taking some time to pray about it, research in the Watchtower Library the principles of whether or not it would be blessed, consulting with some trusted elders and C.O.s, and get plenty of rest to better understand it, I have finally gotten it figured out in my head just enough to tell you all.

(Forgive me. I'm super excited about this, so I am going to be trying super hard to be calm in this post!) 

For 6 years, I've had a desire deep in my heart that has not been able to be forgotten. Nope, its not a sister. Sorry to break it like that for all you romantics out there. Sure, that will come someday, but I don't think that day is here yet. The post from my 'Prelude to Africa' blog on Sunday, August 1, 2010, reveals what this is all about:


Japan.
Not everyone's cup of tea, but honestly said: I love it there. So I've decided to pursue serving in Japan. I will put as much effort into Japan as I have into Africa and Italy. This will be the first time that I've actually reached out for something that I truly wanted. Africa and Italy are both amazing blessings, but neither have I been actually excited about like I am with Japan. Hopefully within the next year or two, I will be in Japan. More information to come. :]
I've been encouraged to reach out for additional privileges to be of more use to a congregation. So as of June 25th, I'll be returning home to do just that. From there, I will be better equipped to reach out for Japan. Perhaps it is time for it now, as before I would be too unprepared. The long and the short of it is as said.

Readers, ask away. Any questions? Any opinions or comments? Comment box below. :]

Whether Jehovah does indeed bless this new venture, this new skyline, I am appreciative for all that he has done. Of each of the three areas he has directed me, each has been amazing and worth it in differing ways. Bethel, Africa, Italy. Each one has its own blessings, experiences, and its own avenues where my growth has been spurred on. That being said, these words go out towards Jehovah.

Thank you, Jehovah, for showing me how to do the impossible. Thank you for the friends you've given, thank you for the hardships you allowed, and thank you for the innumerable blessings that I will never fathom. Thank you for your forgiveness when I'm weak, and thank you for your patience when I'm deceived. Thank you for clearing up my illusions, and for fixing my broken body. Thank you for your humility when I am haughty, and thank you for the mend when my heart has shattered. Thank you for overlooking my naivety, and for loving my imperfections. Thank you for not allowing my sins to cover your eyes, and thank you for allowing me to live for you. Thank you for never giving up on me when I give up on you, and thank you for not forsaking me when I've forsaken you. Thank you for giving me what I don't deserve, and thank you for helping me deserve what I won't take. Thank you for your strength when I seek my own, and thank you for seeking me when I am lost. Thank you for a hand when I've lost my soul, and thank you for a shoulder when my spirit is crushed. Thank you for helping me find myself when no one else could, and thank you for the supports, both earthly and heavenly.

And Jehovah,
Thank you for showing me many horizons, many adventures, many perspectives, and for continually giving me a Skyline Worth Following.

~T



PS. For an awesome experience about the usefulness of our invitations to our meetings check out Eric's blog (found in my links section) entitled 'To Good to be True' from Thursday, May 17, 2012! Its a great experience!

Italy- A Small Blog for the Small Things

Hey, you! Sitting on the couch, wishing you had more to read about Trevor?
Ever think that you don't get enough of his awesome writing?
Ever want to see some of the little things that he can never seem to include?

Not anymore! With 9 simple payments of $14.99, you can read Trevor's brand new 'Mini Blog"!
Or, you know, you could just click the 'skylinetumbls' link on my links section.

skylinepath.tumblr.com

For all those little things that I can never share, now you can be let in on the smaller side of blogging. I call it my skylinetumbls micro blog! Check it now for updates on my recent trip to Napoli, Italy!

Ciao for now, readers!

Ps. Don't worry, this is still my main blog. :]

Italy- This One is for the Readers

A little birdie told me something that intrigued me. Strange, I thought, because birdies usually don't talk, but with enough sleep deprivation most anything can happen. Anyway, here is what it told me:
"Trevor, you have a lot of readers in Hawaii that check your blog regularly."
So this brings to my mind a number of questions.
(1) Who are these readers?
(2) How long have they been reading?
(3) And WHY didn't they introduce themselves to me?! SUPER rude.

I have therefore decided to give what we may call a 'shout out' to all of my readers, but at this point especially my Hawaiian readers.
So for all of my readers from the Islands, I say: "Shoots, bu!" Thanks so much for the reads and for sending some of the best of your culture for me to live with! Luke, Javan, Zech, and Eric are all great guys, and I love em to death. Now what's a guy got to do around here to get some shout outs from the Hawaiians? Come on, people, leave me a comment, would you??

For the rest of my loyal (and semi not loyal) readers, a healthy dose of greetings and thanks go out to you as well! With out you, this blog would be totally possible. But you make it easier. And worth it.
:]

Update time.

• New friends from Hawaii (two couples) have joined us for a month. There are a lot of Hawaiians here. Is there anyway that we can get some Alaskans over here? Seriously, people, we're representing Alaska poorly!
• I haven't taken photos in awhile.
• I had a great visit with my best study, Taiwo. Remember him from the Memorial pictures? 
• I found an awesome tea spot that sells great tea. Obviously. 

So that's kinda it for now. I'm preparing some information for the Poll on the upper right. I'll end up posting most of the subjects, but according to your votes. You decide which one comes first! Yay, isn't that exciting??
Also, I'll soon update you on what I meant by the 'game changer'. I still haven't really figured it all out yet, but I'll get there. SO sorry for the delay, everyone.

RIGHT. Requests, comments, suggestions, what not etc etc. You know how to comment. :]

Italy- Random

WARNING. THIS BLOG IS DRASTICALLY LESS INTERESTING THAN MOST. IF YOU HAVE ALLERGIC REACTIONS TO BORING STUFF, YOU REALLY NEED TO LEARN TO ENTERTAIN YOURSELF OR ELSE YOUR LIFE WILL BE QUITE DIFFICULT. Not that all my posts are interesting, but really. This one is very similar to vacuums.
...Heh heh. Get it?

Hm. I'm having a really hard time thinking of a post title. What shall I do?

I was going to post all about the different new roommates that I have, but as many of you may have seen, there is a 'Poll' on the side with that as an option. I guess that I'll just leave it there for now and let you all imagine what my roommates are like for the time being. Let me just say that they are Hawaiian. 
Yeah.

So recently we had the C.O. visit. The brother's name is Julian Hodson. From London. Cool, right? Married an Italian sister and now (obviously) speaks Italian. That helps in the communication, I would assume. Anyway, the visit had to be altered because there was a Zone Visit here in Italy, and our congregation was invited. Seeings how the Sunday meeting would fall on the same day as the Zone Visit, they moved the Sunday meeting to Friday. So then Saturday we went to Imola to help clean the Assembly Hall, but arrived too late and didn't have anything to do.
Then Sunday we went to the Zone Visit on Sunday. Here is where we stumble people.

WARNING. DO NOT READ THE FOLLOWING IF McDONALDS STUMBLES YOU.

Other than the main talk, the program was in Italian. So when the Watchtower came (right before the main talk), we were a bit dismayed to learn that it was all in Italian. So...
We uh...Took a short...recess. Somewhere. Outside...The Assembly Hall. I won't tell you where.

...Wait...

SO ANYWAY. Now 3 of the guys that make up our little homestead are now in London making their way around to Ireland for kicks. For one week, Zech and I will get the house to ourselves, then they return home and we spend our last 2 months. (For me, at least)

Sorry it is a boring post, but that is all you get. I can't be handsome and charming all the time, can I?
Well, maybe I can. *ding* That was my smile, in case you didn't know.

Ciao for now!
~T

PS. Taking requests as well, but pay attention to the poll up top. It isn't going to be there forever. It feels sort of sad, all alone there with no one to call a friend. :[

Italy- A Side Seldom Seen

Read through it all before you cast your opinion, readers. This post balances itself only when all parts are paid attention. 

Malicious and cruel, Satan hatefully uses the blessing of our heart against us. Gifted with the most unique quality the physical realm has ever known, our emotion has been turned against us in the most hurtful of ways. He has succeeded in turning something holy, pure, and unequivocally blissful into something twisted and shadowed. A Greatness turned to Weakness, we are at times left to the mercy of a man slaughterer, dark and demonic.
A side seldom seen by most is the most realistic one of all. Inescapable, inevitable, and powerful. But highly overestimated. This side of all of us continues to put on airs, raising itself on a throne higher than it ever was meant to dwell.
Sitting lonely in a crowded room, the weaknesses of the flesh continue to creep up and remind us of our imperfections. Smiling wide to hide the aches of the heart, we force ourselves to feel to convince ourselves that we're still alive.
 A sleeping sailor will sail no tomorrow sea. This weakness threatens to crush and break all those who have fallen asleep.
When we serve a congregation to our best, what do they see but only what we show?
They only see the signals we send out. They only see the flags we fly. They only know the masks we wear.
They seldom see the times we cry. They seldom know of the sleepless nights. They seldom heard the words of a wavering soul. The seldom see the pain behind the smiles. And the same for us towards them. Imagine what we don't see.
They seldom see us nap on the trains and buses from exhaustion. They seldom see us break down in private. They seldom see the times we've fallen asleep on coffee bar couches, or the times we've been dragged out of bed and through the day by the ones that know us the best. The same goes for us towards them. Imagine what we don't see.
Imagine what the brothers serving as Elders and Traveling Overseers experience...

The conclusion of the matter is: Well worth it. Every bit.

Even as Satan himself twists our fragile beings against us, Jehovah is there to delicately heal our broken spirits. Imagine the pain of heart as he sees the weakest of his creations put through the worst of pains, torturing them emotionally, physically, and spiritually. Imagine for just a moment what he is forced to see everyday of his dearest little children...never were they supposed to know such pain. Imagine, though, how he feels when they raise up from the blood that stains their clothes and skin. Such pride he must feel when his fragile, weak little children prove themselves more mighty in heart and resolve than his powerful spirit sons who have not proven faithful. When we fight and give forth the blood, sweat, and tears that he receives with such happiness, he records every single moment. Not a day goes by that he doesn't see how we suffer. Not an hour does he turn his eyes from us. Not a single moment in our lives are we invisible to such love from our God, Jehovah. 
Whether we serve in a capacity that allows further privileges because our circumstances allow such, whether we are doing what is possible for our abilities hampered by weak flesh, whether our responsibilities require close attention to a family and its spiritual needs, or anything else, Jehovah records all of is as equal value when we give him all our best.

Brothers, Sisters. We serve at a time that history will never forget. Mankind's salvation, Jehovah's vindication of his name, the restoration of his Eternal purpose. We are not the type that will shrink back to destruction. What a privilege we have...what a blessing to live at such a time as this.
Shall we make our choice to stick close to each other, no matter the pains that come? Shoulder to shoulder, let us serve our God with zeal and joy, ever loyal as we march into that new world. What do you say?

~T

Ps. Haha, let me clarify. Some have asked me if my last post about a 'game changer' meant I was dating. Nope. I'm still very single. More clarification to come as I can. :]